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Archgoat - Heavenly Vulva (Christ Last's Rites) Review

by Matt Hensch

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Archgoat is the most pleasant band on Earth. They are warm, comforting, and lyrically appropriate for your kids. Nah, I'm just kidding. Archgoat is a vile, maggot-infested masochist that has ruled Finland’s death/black metal niche since their inception in 1989. The creators of many gruesome albums including "Angelc*** (Tales of Desecration)" and "Whore of Bethlehem" return with another grim slab of sexually depraved death/black metal that leeches off the light until it drowns in total oblivion. The EP is "Heavenly Vulva (Christ's Last Rites)," and once again Archgoat dives into the rancid depths of slimy death/black metal that sounds like a Beherit gone to Hell, a Blasphemy asphyxiating on soil, or an Autopsy crawling through a crypt. I mean, how can you deny the awesomeness of a band that has a song called "Blessed Vulva?"

Well, you really can't, and there's actually a lot positives coming from the hammering penetration that Archgoat has mastered over the years. The overall mix is a toxic mixture of banging percussion (usually a mid-paced blast beat) drooling over super-basic black/death metal riffs reeking of Beherit-ish touches and sickening chimes of extreme metal in its embryonic stage. Variation appears minimal– the only true rebel is "Day of Clouds," which slowly smokes out unhurried notes in a punching rhythmic crunch that bites again and again. The vocals, too, are guttural and indecipherable chomps which stay unchanged; Archgoat is seldom praised for their extensive changes on the musical end in case you were wondering. It's overall a very simple and transparent effort mirroring the instrumentality of other primitive acts, but Archgoat remains charming for some reason that I really can't identify. Again and again I transpire from "Blessed Vulva" to "Passage to Millennial Darkness" with few complaints or criticisms.

Then again, The EP only runs for sixteen minutes, but it all works quite smoothly overall. Despite it being a short, ghastly and punishing listen, "Heavenly Vulva" is promising enough to lead a once-neutral individual into the herd of Archgoat. You either love or really, really hate stuff like this, so proceed lest you despise raw, archaic metal that only wants your blood and bones. Just don’t be surprised if you sideline your Black Dahlia Murder records and find Archgoat to be sadistic, elementary, and utterly repulsive. Their malevolent assault is indeed intentional, and it’s a captivating feat in more ways than one. Insignificant, but captivating.

Archgoat - Heavenly Vulva (Christ Last's Rites)

Rating:7.0

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