Now Axel and his band have built quite the reputation over many years, and to experience them flushing it down with a covers-only release is painful beyond measure. Standing as success' antagonist, the dreadful Diamonds Unlocked captures horrible makeovers that weren't meant to be covered by Axel Rudi Pell; and it's obvious someone's ass is on the slab for such a grand error. Featuring classic anthems from artists like Michael Bolton (lol) and U2, Diamonds Unlocked proudly desecrates many once-great tunes by stripping away decency until only boredom remains alive. Watch out Six Feet Under! You now have competition for making s***ty cover records!

Most of the items here have – at one time or another – been heard by nearly anyone involved with any musical genre, so digesting such a minimalist take on ten wonderful trophies leaves a clear path for who's at fault here: Axel and his fellow yuppies. Musically, each note of every anthem is played properly, but our German buddies thought it would be nice to force in their own instrumental tones without following the selection of cover material both on musical and vocal guidelines. Songs that once had soft guitars now contain unnecessary heavy riffs; tracks forged upon tame guitar solos are now violated by Pell' spastic leads without coherency on his behalf; hymns layered with energetic singing melodies are now ruined by horrible vocals unfit for each and every carol. Basically, everything done by Axel Rudi Pell is remade into a heavier version without aiming for any enjoyable qualities in the meantime; just like being heavy for the sake of being heavy. Here's a newsflash: U2's "Beautiful Day" doesn't need guitar squeals!

Pushing more weight on this dying effort is Jonny Gioeli's awful striving to add in his sub-par vocals upon these legendary tunes, which only dropkicks Diamonds Unlocked right in the gonads. Gioeli typically poses as an off-key singer with no sense of fundamental vocal characteristics, which sucks horribly, but making this bowel movement even worse is his lack of comprehension within the multiple songs when he's supposed to take control; it's very clear we're not dealing with Roger Daltry's second-coming. And there isn't anything special about the bass guitar or percussion as they're chained to Diamonds Unlocked and Axel's one-way random shredding for his own ego.

On the bright side, a little justice made its way to Pell's version of The Who's "We Won't Get Fooled Again," although it's far from greatness as one could predict. Everything sounds quite alright musically, yet Ferdy Doernberg's keyboards lack necessary energy the original thrived on; despite that, it's somewhat enjoyable overall. Also, Axel and crew decided to write one track as an insurance policy for this crippling atrocity entitled The Diamond Overture. Despite its shiny name, forty-five seconds of doltish guitar notes, random atmospheric keyboards, and tangled solos can't aid the remaining fifty-five minutes of senseless feces. And that's basically what Diamonds Unlocked is all about: sloppy playing smeared upon repulsiveness.